So Why Are You Planning a Wedding?
If you answered “to get married” *sound the buzzer* because that’s the wrong answer.
Getting married is simply the function of a wedding, not the purpose. When we talk about purpose, we want to know why you’re going through the time, expense and effort to host a wedding.
The truth is you can get married in your backyard for a few hundred dollars and be just as married as those who plan luxury multi-million dollar weddings.
That’s why before you plan your wedding it’s important for you as a couple to figure out your purpose and have this be the driving force behind any and all wedding decisions you make.
So, what are some examples of the purpose of a wedding? There are many possibilities, but here are a few:
- bringing your families together to celebrate with you
- having an amazing experience
- honouring cultural or religious traditions
- celebrating the future you’re creating together
Every wedding purpose is as unique as the couple it defines and explains the why, the what, and the who of your wedding. It’s what will make your wedding feel like it belongs to you.
But how do you figure out what your purpose is?
What need does having a wedding fulfill?
Why is it important to have a wedding and why now?
Who are you celebrating with? Why?
What impact do you want the wedding to have on them?
What would have had to happen for you both to feel really great about your wedding day?
These questions aren’t something you should be able to answer off the top of your head: spend some time really thinking about and discussing each answer. Putting time and effort into this very beginning stage of planning is going to give you direction, ease, and reassurance throughout every other stage of your wedding planning process.
Once you have your answers look at them together and see the similarities and themes across all of them. Are the presence and experiences of your guests a major or minor part of your purpose? What is going to make this day special to you and your partner(s) when you look back at it? Are the reasons driving you to have a wedding truly about you and your partner(s). Remember that your wedding and its purpose should be all about you and your partner(s): you’re never going to please everyone so don’t try, have a wedding because you want to have a wedding.
Many people have weddings because it’s what you’re supposed to do when you get married, and how they plan their weddings is about following tradition and pleasing the people in their lives. A wedding purpose is about finding the true intentions behind your decision to have a wedding, and ensuring that in every step of planning the focus is on you and your partner(s), not about tradition or the expectations of others. Your wedding should be a reflection of your relationship and love with and for your partners, find a purpose that reflects that and the actual planning of your wedding will start to make a lot more sense.